How to Make Saying No Easier

Learning how and when to say no is an important life skill to master. But saying this two-word refusal can harder than it seems. Turning down a request can leave you feeling lousy, worried, or anxious. Even though you sometimes realise that you can’t fulfil the request, saying yes often feels much more comfortable.

It’s no surprise that saying no is one of the hardest words to say. We all want to be team players and feel we are useful employees. You may also think that you are letting the other person down if you don’t agree with them. So, how can you learn to say no and still feel good about yourself?

The key to saying no is knowing how it can affect your career. Steve Jobs is quoted as saying that “focusing is about saying no”. A lack of focus can cause you to allow temporary emotions to force you to make permanent decisions with long-lasting consequences.

Of course, there are many ways to increase your productivity at work and saying no is just one of them.

In this article, you will learn the secrets of how to say no at work.

Reasons Why It’s Hard to Say No

There are several reasons why saying no in the workplace can be so tricky sometimes. Here are a few reasons:

• In a competitive job market, you could fear that you risk losing your job or a client if you say no.
• You avoid saying no because you don’t want to let the other person down.
• A request comes over as a rhetorical question, and you feel forced to agree.
• You haven’t taken the time to analyse what saying yes involves.

How to Say No

Rather than being a sign of weakness, it takes self-awareness, courage, and confidence to learn how to say no.

Let’s look at three ways how you can make saying no easier.

1. Think before you speak

Before quickly agreeing to something, take your time to asses the request. You need to figure out if this is something you want to do and have the time to do. All it takes is to ask to check your schedule and get back to the person. Taking some time can help you focus on what is essential. If you see that you are too stretched, you will find it easier to say no.

Even if you just don’t want to do what’s being asked, you will feel more in control if you think before you speak.

Of course, you may find that your schedule allows you to take on the task, in which case, there’s no harm in saying yes.

2. Learn the art of saying no

Saying no becomes much easier when you learn the ‘art’ of refusing. Think about it; there are two ways of throwing a tennis ball to someone. You could throw with such force that it’s difficult to catch or even hurt the person. Or, you could gently toss the ball so that it’s easy to catch. It’s the same as saying no.

A quick, short, sharp “no” can come across as blunt. Also, coming up first of all with a list of excuses and explaining your workload can come across as passive-aggressive.

To make it easier to say no to your boss or a co-worker, thank the person for thinking of you. Explain what your priorities are currently and why you need to finish them correctly. You can then tell why your schedule wouldn’t allow you to do an excellent job on their project.

Always reply with conviction so that your “no” is non-negotiable.

3. Offer an alternative

The third secret to making it easy to say no is to offer some other options. For a start, you could offer to help your boss or colleague help to find a solution. You could help with doing a few small favours, proofreading a draft, or discussing the situation in more depth. A willingness to pitch in and work as a team can go a long way in fostering good workplace relationships.

It is also good to be empathetic about the situation. Even if they don’t like your refusal, you can make it easier for them to accept it.

Of course, if you say you're too busy on other projects, it’s good that you’re not seen idly chatting with your workmates during lengthy breaks.

In conclusion, saying no can be hard if you’re in the habit of always saying yes. Having your priorities clear in mind and refusing politely, but firmly, you will find it easier to start saying no.